Unmasking Diet Culture: How Neurodivergent People Learn to Survive by Fitting In
For many neurodivergent people, diet culture can feel like a survival strategy, a way to mask, belong, and find control in a world that often feels confusing or critical. Beneath food rules and body image struggles often lies something deeper: the need to be accepted.
The Roots of “Fitting In”
Psychodynamic theory reminds us that our earliest experiences of acceptance and rejection shape how we see ourselves. When a child learns that being “different” leads to disapproval or exclusion, they may internalise shame and develop schemas like Defectiveness, Unrelenting Standards, or Social Isolation.
For neurodivergent individuals, such as those with ADHD or autism, the constant feedback that they are “too much,” “too sensitive,” or “too distracted” can lead to chronic masking. Dieting or controlling food may then become another form of masking: a way to appear “normal,” “disciplined,” or “worthy” in a neurotypical world (Butterfly Foundation).
How Diet Culture Exploits the Need to Belong
Diet culture thrives on comparison and conformity. It promises acceptance through thinness, control, and perfection, all values that resonate with people who have learned that safety comes from fitting in.
For some neurodivergent people, the structure of diet rules can feel comforting; for others, hyperfocus on eating or exercise provides a sense of order in a chaotic world. But this pursuit of control often deepens shame and disconnects individuals from their body’s natural cues and needs.
Reclaiming Authenticity and Self-Trust
Healing from diet culture means gently unmasking, both around food and identity. Through therapy, we can explore:
Where did I learn that I need to be different to be accepted?
What emotions or fears lie beneath my need for control?
How can I nurture parts of myself that were once silenced or shamed?
Through compassionate self-inquiry, individuals can begin to replace external rules with internal trust, learning to eat, move, and express themselves in ways that feel authentic rather than performative.
Unmasking is not about losing control but about finding safety in being real.
Final Reflection
Diet culture tells us that fitting in will make us lovable. But true belonging comes from authenticity, not perfection.
For neurodivergent people, healing means turning inward, learning to trust the body and mind that have always been doing their best to survive.
If you are ready to challenge diet culture and truly heal your inner self, affirming and trauma-informed care is a wonderful step. Contact us to explore whether we are the right fit to help you start your journey towards eating disorder recovery.
Note: The information provided in this blog is for educational purposes only and is NOT intended as medical /psychological advice. Please consult a healthcare professional for personalised guidance.
